I once read a quote about the best mindset in love, which is:
everything I have given to you is voluntary, I won’t complain anything about this. If you love me back, then I will appreciate, but if you feel nothing in return, I won’t be discouraged either. If someday I won’t love you as much as I did, then let’s set part and live happily to our own.
I have fallen in love a couple of times in my life. Every time I was being complete honest and open. But I was connected very deep with my insecurities, so I was being also very fragile and hysterical. I had met a guy who I thought liked me and was honest with me, turned out to be the biggest lair in my life. I was shocked to find out a guy who claimed liked me and not in a relationship actually is in a long term relationship and was engaged for a long time. I honestly couldn’t know how he managed to balance the real life and the fake life for such a long time. Aside from impressed by his masterful lying skill, I feel tremendously sorry for his fiancé who loves him and trusts him.
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There was an idea in my whole life:
once I finished my study, then I would complete learning; once I found my dream job, then I would be settled; once I found a partner, then I would love him forever; once I went to Germany, I would realize my life time dream..
If I had learned something this year, I learned that, life is always changing, we are always changing, there is no such term as completion. Whatever happened to us every day, whoever we met in our life in a daily basis, make us change to a person who we probably didn’t expect us to be.
Ten years ago, I was just like most of girls who graduated from school, and dreamed about our own dreams, it was walking on a foreign land, and discovering my soul and my spirit, it was working in movie industry and working with people who I admired, it was being a journalist and exposing the dark side of the society. I had so much dreams in my life, not because I have knowledge of them, but I thought it would make me feel alive, feel special or I think this should be the way to make me grow.
Continue reading “Life is not about completing”